Marriage Rites in Nigeria: The Indigenous and the Alien

Author: Faforiji Tadese Obaloluwa. 

    Marriage is beautiful thing and it is one of the most fundamentals in life. The definition of marriage varies from ethnic to ethnic. To the Yorubas, for an instance, it is somewhat a beginning that is both temporal and spiritual in nature, unlike the aliens, who see marriage as a physical rite entirely. Notably, the differences in the interpretations of marriage rites lie the resultant effects of marriage itself and society at large. That is, the way we see it shapes the way we see our society and the way it, the society, does to us in return.

   The spread of the European culture ( white culture) has in fact put paid to our beloved cultural practices. It is acrimoniously disgusting  to see that our mentality also followed the course. However, it is pertinent to note that this is not to castigate our now ways of thinking but to lament on the fast, backward travels of our cultural heritage. Why do we like the white marriage rites ? Why giving white names to our children ? Why do we think the civilised ones are those people with European dialect or tone when speaking ? Why do we always quote according to Booth, Aristotle, Nicolas, Albert etc , when Mansa Musa, Sunny Allie, Oduduwa,  and others had treated the same course in discourse ? That shows we lack something fundamental !

   We may not know. The rate at which we travel backward is rapid and this is a big blow to our beloved culture. There are many countries who were colonised for over 300 years and yet they stick to their culture.  Nigeria was under the unfortunate course of colonisation for just 100 years and she had lost, not only her cultural heritage, but also herself. Be it political, economy, social, religion and culture, we keep wallowing in the abyss of chaos and unending disasters. We've lost the glory of our existence to those who needed it. We've let the glory fell in return for a short-live materialism.  

   The reasons behind our fervent love for 'white marriage' is still unknown. In truth, the indigenous marriage rites  among the Nigeria's ethnic groups are the best to have in the world. Why ? Not because of the flow of irrational, meaningless noises like the other side, but because of the richness in value and the recognition of the spiritual aspect of it. Since the foreigners there tell us that it's a physical thing, then divorce also becomes a normal thing as well. This is the contemporary Nigeria, where everyone cherishes the flashes of alien culture and keep off their eyes to their own, rich one. We want to show off anyway "just like the way....." Anyway, this doesn't stop a marriage from collapse. In fact, it heightens the propensity of divorce when marriage reaches  two decades as both partners hardly find something lovely in themselves any longer. The divorce under the traditional marriage rites is very, very rare because of the recognition and attachment of the spiritual lives of both partners in terms of prayers, and others which only exist in peripheral on the other side. 

   Now when none of the foreign countries is naming their children according to the Africans, we produce many alien names than ours, ourselves. Now in the very root of Nigeria ( in even local villages), there many Sylvester, Trump, Kate, Giovanni, Messi etc. The usefulness of this unknown names is yet to even be clarified by the cherisher and the named. In order to build up the values in our children, good names,  in our  cultural way, should be given to them? Imagining beautiful names like Omotola, Ayomide, Adunni, Omotade, Omolewa, Adebisi, Adedamola, Oyindamola, Adedoyin etc 

 As they keep calling them, the nature of the names portray in their lives. Also on the other hands, once they are named 'Disaster', 'Forest' or 'Lake', in our own interpretation of these names,  they will actually be like one, one day. Cherish your status and value your value. God bless Nigeria.

Credit: FAFORIJI Tadese Obaloluwa.